Yesterday my heart broke, again. A sweet and beutiful little soul passed out of this life and on into the timeless expanse of the Great Eternal Hunting Ground. There really are no words, just memories and tears left to haunt my heart and existance.
*
Her name was True Blue Silvie, and she was born just four Octobers ago. A tiny little blue sable fluff of a puppy who entered our lives along with her sister in a time when my husband was already in such decline that, even though he loved them, he could never remember their names.
Silvie saw it all, the struggle and the pain, as well as the moments of closeness and joy. All the while she was my best little friend and companion. Never a day passed that I didnt have my little shadow to warn me of dangers, report that the phone was ringing or tell on the cat or other little dogs whenever someone was misbehaving. She even taught herself to wipe her feet on the kitchen mat every time she came in from outside after once seeing me do it. She adored her human and tried to do everything mama did.
She had a great home with lots of freedom to be a dog as well as part of a small farmstead with other critters and her own family pack. Then, at two years old, she became pregnant and had three beautiful boys. She was very devoted to her babies and instictively was such a good and attentive little mother. Around that same time however, something secret and dangerous was happening inside her little body. Still yet, she looked healthy and remained cheerful and happy as always.
Sometimes she played in the snow or summer grass with her family, sometimes she ran in the forest pretending to be a wild wolf on the hunt, sometimes she enjoyed the warmth of the sun on her soft brown coat, and always of an evening she joined me with rest of her pack and two cats for a nature show and cuddle time in the recliner. She also loved to help me gather up the hens or pick vegetables and herbs, go for long walks by the lak,e and to sit so proudly by my side on our horse and buggy rides.
It seemed as if we would be together for many good years, then this past month I noticed an alarming walnut sized lump in her abdomen. To make a difficult story shorter, she went to the vet, was diagnosed with a huge stone that filled her whole little bladder. The vet recommended surgery to remove it and while he was in there to do a spay as well. He did both on Tuesday and sent her home with medications. After that we were all on our own for a long weekend. Those few days after the surgery my heart ached as she desperately struggled for her life, but no matter her own will to live, or how I tried to help her she wasnt able to eat, drink or pee and never recovered.
Silvie died in my arms in the wee hours of Friday morning July the fourth.
The house seems emptier now, the place quieter, my time here a little more tenuous. The heartbreak is real, the loss final, as is the way of death, and my tears come and go with the lingering intensity of summer storms.
Beautiful, precious little Silvie...all she ever wanted was just to love, and be loved in return...
*
Her name was True Blue Silvie, and she was born just four Octobers ago. A tiny little blue sable fluff of a puppy who entered our lives along with her sister in a time when my husband was already in such decline that, even though he loved them, he could never remember their names.
Silvie saw it all, the struggle and the pain, as well as the moments of closeness and joy. All the while she was my best little friend and companion. Never a day passed that I didnt have my little shadow to warn me of dangers, report that the phone was ringing or tell on the cat or other little dogs whenever someone was misbehaving. She even taught herself to wipe her feet on the kitchen mat every time she came in from outside after once seeing me do it. She adored her human and tried to do everything mama did.
She had a great home with lots of freedom to be a dog as well as part of a small farmstead with other critters and her own family pack. Then, at two years old, she became pregnant and had three beautiful boys. She was very devoted to her babies and instictively was such a good and attentive little mother. Around that same time however, something secret and dangerous was happening inside her little body. Still yet, she looked healthy and remained cheerful and happy as always.
Sometimes she played in the snow or summer grass with her family, sometimes she ran in the forest pretending to be a wild wolf on the hunt, sometimes she enjoyed the warmth of the sun on her soft brown coat, and always of an evening she joined me with rest of her pack and two cats for a nature show and cuddle time in the recliner. She also loved to help me gather up the hens or pick vegetables and herbs, go for long walks by the lak,e and to sit so proudly by my side on our horse and buggy rides.
It seemed as if we would be together for many good years, then this past month I noticed an alarming walnut sized lump in her abdomen. To make a difficult story shorter, she went to the vet, was diagnosed with a huge stone that filled her whole little bladder. The vet recommended surgery to remove it and while he was in there to do a spay as well. He did both on Tuesday and sent her home with medications. After that we were all on our own for a long weekend. Those few days after the surgery my heart ached as she desperately struggled for her life, but no matter her own will to live, or how I tried to help her she wasnt able to eat, drink or pee and never recovered.
Silvie died in my arms in the wee hours of Friday morning July the fourth.
The house seems emptier now, the place quieter, my time here a little more tenuous. The heartbreak is real, the loss final, as is the way of death, and my tears come and go with the lingering intensity of summer storms.
Beautiful, precious little Silvie...all she ever wanted was just to love, and be loved in return...
Pawprints forever on my heart........
SvG
SvG
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